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Passing Time

The sun says goodnight to the world as the city lights turn on. The darkness of the night is quiet and still. The air is hot and forgetting that snow fell a days earlier. The parking lot is full of out of state cars while the guests remain quiet with their secret visit. The visitors stay to themselves and will occasionally give a smile or say hello in the hallway. The bedroom window looks over the parking lot and towards the unpopular Marriott Courtyard that stands on the other side. The sight of visitors pulling in and out of parking spots encompasses the vision. The eyes and mind long for the outside world but the body is not ready to take the steps to the car and to a final destination. One must wait patiently until healing becomes more apparent. One stares at the visitors entering the hotel and the passing cars that make the wide turn from Santa Fe to C-470. The nights are long and not filled with sleep.

The days come with hope but can be immediately changed with the slight movement. The smallest movement requires a long rest and the thirst becomes deep almost as if the taste buds are fighting a monster in the mouth. It desires it, it wants it and it will get it. A deep sigh fills the lungs and sound of the quiet room. As the eyes wonder outside, one begins to wonder when they will be able to enjoy outside and to be able to walk normal again. The mind is filled with logical scenarios of life and the future. The radio is filled with the sweet and hard words of Johnny Bye-Bye by Bruce Springsteen. The lap top balances on the good knee while the other is wrapped like a pretty blue package. The cold air from the ice emerges from the machine and hits the knee. The knee is helpless and must lay there taking the cold and torture. There is no movement from the knee for it knows that movement will not help and will only make things worse. The bright lights that oversee the car dealership shine in the large window. The lights reflect on the newly marketed trucks making those more visible and desirable. The internet never rests and each room rotates from shows. The sounds of typing on a keyboard fill the daylight while the deep groans can be heard in the background as the recovering knee is being stretched out. The morning never comes fast enough and is greeted with breakfast and coffee.

The sound of the walker rolls through the room and then through the hotel hallways like a dead body. The slow walk to the other side is felt with each step and breath. The colorful decoration of line formation on the floor are used as markers for progress and the “believe” chandler that fill the hallway are a mystery, for the word “believe” is listed in several languages. The question of why they selected that word is curious. Little dog feet run around, playing with Mr. Chicken creating a smile on the face and providing entertainment through the day. The propane fire pit can be seen and becomes a topic of conversation when regulars make that spot their daily ritual. The buds from cigarettes are thrown in the propane fire pit and all around even though there is a disregard station just feet away. Some days are swollen away with exercises, medication and sleep. The mind thinks back to the details of the surgery and hand slowly moves down to fill where it happened. The new metal that has now been placed in the right knee provides opportunities within the professional and personal life. Certain jobs that one was not able to complete before are now open doors and the adventure is thrilling. One cannot wait to stand on a trail and feel the dirt under the shoes and to walk up a hill without bending over in horrible pain.

The process is still slow and will be awhile until that is accomplished but at least the end goal is getting closer and is not a clouded moment in the mind. Soon exhaustion will be a thing of the past and energy will be number one. The feeling of gratefulness fills the soul, for recovery would not have happened without family and friends. Their kind words fill the heart and provide strength for the next leg of recovery. The days of moving the trailer become closer and the ideas of remodel engulfs time. As the next chapter starts with a new knee, so does new employment, new hope, new path and most importantly a mind filled with calmness. As the clock turns late, a deep breath filled the lungs and the sound of the music fades away in the background. Guests of the hotel have checked in and the hotel remains quiet. The night comes to a close and soon the sun will be beating on the hog backs ready to welcome another day of accomplishments. Until then, enjoy the night, the peace and the stillness, for every night changes with each passing blink of the eye.

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